Monologues

Connecting with nature

2011-08-20T09:47:00.007+05:30

The green countryside was overly alluring to let the soul remain encased in the dreary city!

Tagging along with the foliagers, we rattled on to the obscure village Ajiveli, about 60 kms from Pune.

This is a place where you literally get down to earth and walk through mud. The meandering unpaved road to the forest is a delight. You will get to see real architectural masterpieces. I saw these amazing ants nest. One on the ground, constructed like a fort and another on a tree, constructed like a pagoda. And with mud!

Slushy trek led us to the Devrai – a dense sacred forest, dedicated to local deities or tree spirits.

The villagers ensure that not a single leaf or a twig is taken from this forest. It is believed that any sort of violation will offend the local deity and could cause calamities.

To connect with nature is an humbling experience. Everything that we require is provided by nature. Including the mechanism to fight the much threatening diseases. Yet, we clamor for stuffs to make our life easier.

There is a strong reason behind every belief and practices. Labeling such beliefs as superstitions, is not completely correct. The villagers believe it is bad karma if, even, a tiny dried leaf is taken from this Devrai. I don't want to analyse this belief. For this belief ensures a balanced ecology, conducive for healthy co-existence of all living creatures.

Sitting in a/c rooms, on cushioned chairs, we forget our very beginnings as we plan to garner more material resources, completely forgetting how we plunder the very earth that has sheltered us. The experience of sitting on a wet, glistening rock, right in a dense jungle (where the sun rays tries to squirms in through the tall trees that forms a canopy of sort, as if protecting the earth from evil spirits), and listening to running water, I tell you, this is the best music I have ever heard!

64 and developing...

2011-08-15T10:49:00.002+05:30

At 64, a senior, yet labelled as 'Developing nation'! Grossly violated, repeatedly humiliated, and frequently raped, that's my India.

Leaders who exudes leech like quality - glued to their cushioned chair, holding on the power like an armor, and hoodwinking the very people who got them the chair. If this is not gross violation, then, I wonder what is!

Our rich heritage and culture repeatedly humiliated in the name of religion. Mandir and Masjid getting demolished in this political tug of war. If this is not humiliating our art and culture, then, I wonder what is!

Mines dug, trees cut, hills brutalized... all in the name of globalization. If this is not raping our beautiful landscape, then, I wonder what is!

And our leaders continue to make lofty claims on Independence day.

Asia's largest potholes

2011-08-01T20:55:00.004+05:30

Nighoj is a nondescript village with acres of eye soothing greenery. About 90 Kms from Pune, off the Pune – Ahmednagar highway, this place is definitely a must visit for those seeking to explore off beat places that leaves one gaping at nature’s craftsmanship. Right on the banks of the river Kukdi!

The Kukdi river boasts of Asia’s largest potholes. It is indeed an eye treat. Gigantic holes sport the river shore. Kukdi river, a tributary of the Bhima River, meandering through the Deccan Plateau has created this natural masterpiece relentlessly through the ages. The locals call the potholes, Kund.

"Believed to be the largest natural pot holes in Asia, the phenomenon known as giants kettles, giants cauldrons or potholes is caused when small hard pebbles are trapped in eddies and, over many thousands of years, drill circular holes into the riverbed."

On the sun kissed autumn morning that I chose to travel, I hardly found any excited human on the potholed bank, except the solitary fisherman trying his luck. One local, who escorted us around the village, tried valiantly to look excited when he told us that no one really knows the depth of this river.

Locals believe that on Janmashtmi ( The day Lord Krishna was born.) an earthern pot filled with water emerges from the main well ( barav). Right at midnight! This is displayed in the temple of Malganga for 3 days. On the 3^rd day, the pot is taken near the well from where it disappears. Goddess malganga’s miracle, local claims and no one questions.

With not a soul around, gentle breeze, happy birds chirping and a relatively sleepy temple of goddess Malganga. I would say this is one place to go and gaze deep into the gorge and drown own stress.

On Pat Rot ism

2011-07-06T08:57:00.001+05:30

The 1.21 billion people erupted in jubilation when the Indian Cricket team won the world cup. Fervid Patriotism was what we witnessed. How a game of cricket drew out the latent patriotic spirit in the 1.21 billion people surprised me immensely. Politicians, bureaucrat, and aam janta sat huddled in their seats, their heart beats synchronized with the ball, bat and the wicket, just like our coalition government.

The night sky lay sprinkled with sparklers while the stochastic night air resonated with a cacophony of the crackers, grossly violating the environmental regulations. Not unlike the garrulous news people on TV.

The scene as I saw it on television is nothing less than a biopic of a nationalist. Political leader, and film stars waving flags and shaking hands with the aam jantas on the pretext of celebrating the world cup victory… or was it to win popularity and votes? I don’t know.

A game is a game. There will be a contestant and there will be another contestant. If one contestant wins, the other loses. At the end both are contestants. So, what is this fuss all about? Let a game remain a game and not a show of nationalism.

There are more important issues that need our immediate attention. Corruption, scams, bribery, illiteracy, population growth, inflation… and the list goes on. People who indulge in these activities are anti nationalists, no less than a gun trotting terrorist.

We need to do our bit here. We have to show our patriotism now, take a pledge to curb these malice from our society in order to make our country sparkle.

A 70+ year old man plans to sit on indefinite fast to get the Jan lokpal bill passed. He is doing this for us, for our kids, our country. Let us all do our bit for our country. Let us show our true colors. I wonder how a world cup can remove corruption from our country.

( written on the night of the world cup win)

What is anxiety playmate?

2010-09-25T09:10:00.000+05:30

What is anxiety playmate? Playmate, what is agony?
You all say day and night ‘love, love’-
Tell me, playmate, what is love! Is it only torment?
It is only shedding tears? Is that only sorrow’s breathing?
Why then in what expectation of joy
People hopefully embrace such sorrow?

In my eyes all is handsome,
All fresh, all spotless, blue sky, darkgreen wood
Liberal moonlight, soft flower-every thing like me.
They only smile, only sing, wish to die after a sportive game-
knows no pain, knows no crying, above all kinds of agony.
Flowers laugh while they get shed, moonlight smilingly disappears,
In the sea of light the star, all smiles, does his form abandon.

Who is happy like me? Come playmate, come near to me-
The joyous song of a happy heart will feed your mind with solace.
If everyday you cry, why not laugh for a single day-
Forget all sadness for at least a day, let all of us sing together.

~ Rabindranath Tagore

Blogger Buzz: Blogger integrates with Amazon Associates

2010-04-05T14:19:00.000+05:30

Blogger Buzz: Blogger integrates with Amazon Associates

Appeal for Financial Help for Arijit Sengupta

2010-01-21T20:23:00.027+05:30

Arijit is like any regular 16 year old kid with dreams in his eyes and a guitar in his hand. He wants to do a course in Company Secretaryship and then law.What sets him apart from the crowd is his determination to rise above odds.

This 16 years old body is afflicted with Nephritic Syndrome since he was a toddler. Dr. M.M.Bahadur, Consultant Nephrologist at Jaslok Hospital, Mumbai diagnosed chronic renal failure and recommended a living related kidney transplant.

Arijit's father, Mr.Indrajit Sengupta donated his kidney. A marathon 6 hours long operation on 16th June, 2005 gave Arijit a new kidney.Unfortunately, he lost his graft and is now on hemodialysis. The doctor has advised immediate cadaver kidney transplant.

The family is in dire need of funds. Here is their tentative requirement:

Cadaver kidney transplant Rs. 4 lakhs approximately.
Dialysis Rs.20000/- per month
Injection Rs 2300/ per week
Post operative medication expense Rs.1.5 lakhs approximately

Family Background: Arijit's father is ailing and is unemployed. His mother is a pre-primary teacher. The family requests you to donate generously to save Arijit.

Arijit needs your prayers and also your money to survive.Please send your contribution to:
Arijit Sengupta – OPD no. 558783 Jaslok Hospital
Bank:IDBI, Jaslok Extension Counter, Mumbai
A/c. no.: 902102000000019
Swift Code: IBKLINBB004
IFSC Code: IBKL0000902

Note: When transferring money to the hospital, register the payee as Arijit Sengupta – OPD no. 558783 Jaslok Hospital
Or to:
Ms. Shikha Sengupta
State Bank of India
A/c. no. 11100609813 Main Branch, Thane
IFSC Code SBIN0000489

You may contact Arijit's mother, Mrs Shikha Sengupta @ +91 9819518947 or his aunt, Ms Shoma @ +91 9969227362 for more details.

Please help!

Right to dignified living?

2010-01-13T21:44:00.006+05:30

Monday morning my colleague pinged this: http://epaper.timesofindia.com/Default/Scripting/ArticleWin.asp?From=Archive&Source=Page&Skin=TOINEW&BaseHref=TOIM/2010/01/12&PageLabel=3&EntityId=Ar00301&ViewMode=HTML&GZ=T.

Apparently, violating the modesty of the lady did not amount to rape.A molester gets away easily just because the lady never had menstural cycle, her sexual organs are deformed and hence she couldn't really have sex. Never heard of such crap.

I cannot help but picturize what the lady must have gone through, standing in the witness box, a cynosure of all eyes,and her intimate details discussed, debated and ridiculed.

Does rape mean forced sex with a woman with fully formed sexual faculties? The perpetrator gets away because the victim's sexual organ was not developed enough for her to enjoy or understand sex. It did not matter a blink that she was humiliated. Her physical deformity was made public. She was ridiculed and, who knows, may have been branded as someone with questionable morale.

Rape is a heinous crime that mars a woman's sexuality and importantly is a gross violation of human rights. A victim is not only sexually manhandled, she is also repeatedly raped by the public attention, her whole self is exposed to public curiosity. The loss is grievous and life long.

As a woman, I do not differentiate between sexual harassment and rape. Both violates human rights.Both have the same object- to undermine the integrity of the victim, physically as well as mentally.

Right to live a dignified life is the birth right of every individual. Yet females - adult and child, gets raped around the world every second. And we talk, we frame rules, we spend millions to frame laws only to see them thwarted, we develop workaround (to help the perpetrators get away), we protest (sometimes in candle light), we re examine our existing laws, we also keep mum lest we are humiliated further....

In short, we never fail to devise strategies to dignified living.This has not reduced the incidence of rape.

Strong, very strong, extremely strong punishment should be a part of these laws. A death sentence. No, a week of extreme humiliation before death. Rapists are criminals and worst than a terrorist. The rapist needs just a penis to terrorize.

Shocked heart

2010-01-09T21:14:00.004+05:30

A wounded cop left to die on the road and the ministers went on their merry tour. Ironically, it was the health minister with his entourage.

When grilled by the media, he defended himself by saying that he was numb with shock.

Ministers are "supposedly" leader of the masses. Do they have the privilege of standing numb with shock? Leaders should have a high emotional quotient, should have the ability to think on their feet.

The government spends our hard earned money to protect such nitwits who,ironically, are elected to protect the masses.

A brave heart died on the road trying to clean our society, without any medical attention, while the pot belied minister in spotless white lungi stood petrified.

It's time that the political parties implement a strict screening of candidates and act responsibly.

Granpa Santa now a saint

2009-12-25T08:16:00.000+05:30

Where art thou, Oh God???

Kurta pajama and austerity

2009-09-10T22:08:00.002+05:30

Does wearing starched white kurta pajama defines austerity in a person?

Our Rahul Baba thinks so. "I generally tend to keep myself austere", pointing out to his simple white kurta-pyjama attire with a chuckle.

Well this makes me wonder, does it all boils down to the adage 'clothes defines a man' and not his action.

Austerity is sacrifice, it is cutting down on comforts to the bare necessity. Wearing kurta pajama is not the parameter to austerity if one travels 1st class, is palisaded by the most elite security force and is carted all over in the best of automobiles.

Mantrijis, if you want to practice austerity, cut down your spendings, stop building statues to prove a sore point and be independent, let the NSGs do what they are trained to do - protecting our country.

"I don't speak for the Government, I speak for the Congress.."

2009-09-10T21:19:00.001+05:30

The Ishrat Jahan isssue is the hottest debate in TV these days. And our clever lawyer, Dr Abhishek Singhvi never fails to clarify that he speaks "only for the congress and not for the government". This makes me wonder how the congress party and the goverment are different.

Congress rejoiced when it won the election with the largest majority and decorated the Parliament with its MPs and now when the Home Ministry is questioned about the Ishrat Jahan's murder, it is seperating itself.

The affidavit was filed in 2006, a year which had a congress man in the home ministry, so I remain flummoxed how the congress and the Government could be different.

South African IT firm recruits homing pigeons to transfer data

2009-09-09T22:41:00.002+05:30

A creative work around for perpectual Web snags, pigeons to replace the net.

With erractic internet connectivity that often slows down business transaction, The Unlimited Group is actually contemplating hiring Winston, a homing pigeon to courier data between its offices 50 miles apart.

They feel that with modern computer hacking, the encrypted data attached to a pigeon is as secure as information sent down a phone line.

I guess this calls for "hawk" busters to ensure easy flow of data.

Gandhian austerity and our netas.... Tweet Tweet

2009-09-08T19:40:00.005+05:30

Politicians and Gandhian philosophy? This is a joke.

It is a fact that politicians congregate in five star hotels and resorts to gamble on "who gets what, when and how". And why shouldn't they? They are after all the policy makers, 'deliberating' on policies that are supposedly going to take the sweaty, recession and inflation strained masses to a new degree of economic and social elevation.

Tough job. Hence the need for the five star luxury. They need to plan all the high sounding, moral promises that they could air (disregarding the environmental laws) to the open mouthed gullible masses who are always ready to believe anything and everything that can make their life a little better.

True. Barkha's mulling is not wrong. But, I wonder which 'society' is she talking about here? 'Society' as in For the Richie Rich, By the Richie Rich, Of the Richie Rich?

Yes, it is contradictory. I believe so. If these Richie Rich could stay in a luxury hotel why not politicians. They are not exactly paupers or jute jhola slung social workers. They are our 'policy jugglers'. They decide our future.

Gandhian philosophy of simple living, staying content with what one has, simple eating habits,forgiving each other, practising non violence, etc is passée.

Think about it, if our politicians starts following Gandhian philosophy, what would happen to our fashion industry, our aviation industry, our out of work and over worked film stars, our internal security....(I mean the NSGs commondos would be roped in to protect our nation instead of gussying up our netas). That's a long list. No, never should our politicians compromise on their life style. They are NOT social workers.

Then what happens to Gandhiji's philosophy?
Never to worry, our politicians would gladly congregate in another luxury hotel to mull over this too.

Women sold to survive drought

2009-09-06T09:16:00.003+05:30

Financial crisis? Sell your woman, girl child, mother for whatever you get.

This is what is happening @ Rahul Baba's and Mayawati devi battle ground (still vying), aka Bundelkhand. And our Baba and Deviji are mute. No flutter of cars rushing to the village, no overnight stay at shanties and no pictures of hand holding solace of the sold woman. After all election is not exactly round the corner.

Cannot blame them either. Bundelkhand.is not exactly at a stone throw distance from either Delhi or Lucknow. Besides, they are not exactly hyperopic. Give them a break!

(A crude joke: These men atleast considers the Women as assets, else why would they sell them off. I mean when we are stuck, we depend on our investments to pass over the bad time, don't we?)

So, the women gets sold. The men gets to eat.

Think about it, during good times, these very men make their women work like donkeys; they work the field, ensures the hearth is laid, dutifully delivers a male child (maybe after the 6th or the 8th girl born), walks miles to get the water.....

As Baba and Deviji plays kabbadi, vying for this nondescript village, flesh trade will flourish.

Salute to my special Teachers

2009-09-05T16:34:00.003+05:30

Another teacher's day.

And I realized that I have never publicly paid tribute to my first teachers, my Parents.

Right from correcting my blabbering and helping me to pronounce my first word correctly to sticking with me right through the most turbulent period of my life, that's my Parents, my teacher. They have rejoiced with me, shed tears for me and patiently tolerated my many follies.

(@ Jungfrau)

Baba and Ma not only taught me (and my siblings) to remain steadfast when things goes haywire, but has also showed, by setting examples, how to resist temptations and be my own best friend.

I am extremely grateful for the solid grounding that I received from them. This is helping me raise a wonderful child single handedly, translating the various hurdles as challenges and taking them head on without compromising my genetic grounding.

Love you, Ma and Baba.

Jonesing Jons

2009-09-05T14:09:00.024+05:30

Anand Jon gets 59 years for serial sex crimes. That was swift. For crimes that he committed for years. He is in his mid 30s; add 59 years to that, he would be knocking 100 when he walks out ( i.e., if he could still walk. Hopefully, his creative hormonal urges would have vitiated, if not completely deadened.)

Good enough!

Coming back to our country, a rapist gets away with easy few years in jail or the punishment waived on account of either "good conduct" or the age factor. (Well, ofcourse the green factor too holds true.)
Read http://www.dailytimesindia.com/2009/04/38557.htm.

Ofcourse, the accused will get to breathe the jail air only if the victim sticks to her words, is not paid off by the accused to keep quiet, and remains strong and steady against the gruelling and humiliating cross questioning.

But, one thing should be noted here, our judiciary is no PT Usha or Anju George. (Agility is for the sure-footed.) Remember the Bhanwari Devi case (or better still watch "Bawandar"), it took years for the judiciary to pass a verdict.

Point to be noted: It passed a judgement in her favor after her gruelling, heartwrenching, and humiliating experience.

There are exceptions too, where a judge took just few days to pass the verdict. But then, this is rare and for the otthethees (guests).

Check http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/7856240.stm.

What I fail to understand is, why this disparity?

It needed the intervention of the NCW to put Shiny Ahuja behind bars. I wonder, had NCW not intervened, then his pativrata personified vociferous wife would have got her way and the poor girl would have been carted off to some obscure corner of the country, never to return to the big city.

What I cannot understand is why can't the lower courts pass a swift sensible judgement after verifying the evidences? Infact, why no fast track court? I once read that rape cases will only be allowed to be heard by a female judge. That would be a good initiative.

Again, what confuses me is the term "Life imprionsonment". I read it as a life long imprisonment. I do not understand why some accused gets away after 12 years or 14 years in prison. Rape is a heinous crime and the perpetrator should be locked away in a dungeon till death (no parole). I still think that this punishment is not adequate enough, he should be continuosly humiliated and tortured in the dark dungeon till his death.

And the girl... she lives a life of perpetual agony, for something that was not her fault.

A friend indeed!

2009-08-28T23:00:00.005+05:30

It couldn't have been a more inoppurtune time to bug Arun. It was 5:50 PM and my daughter's flight was about to land in 5 minutes and I was still about 20 minutes away from the airport. Curtsey: traffic jam.

My heart started a vigorous disco. Thanks to the cellular phone service provider, I just couldn't contact the Kingfisher office.

A person who would rather do her own task than ask for favor, I hesitatingly called up Arun (after all a CEO and Executive Director is a busy man) to enquire if he could send someone to the airport to wait with her till I arrived.

He did not disappoint me.

I felt so humbled and blessed to have a friend like him, a very busy man, who dropped everything to rush to the airport to be with my daughter. He deemed it fit to go there instead of sending one of his executive knowing very well that Guls wouldn't be comfortable with a stranger.He waited there till I reached and completed the hand over formalities.

Thanks a bunch Arun!

Not to forget the refreshing tea his wife, Meenakshi served.

I feel truely blessed!

Filtered swine

2009-08-23T08:53:00.010+05:30

Recession is surely ebbing. Maybe it’s slow at the IT front, but the pharmaceutical and the surgical manufacturing companies are celebrating early Diwali. What with new viruses being discovered and the spurt in the sale of face masks and hand sanitizer. Not to forget the many immunity booster and the vitamins. Long queues of petrified people are seen outside the chemist shop, who doesn’t want to leave any stone unturned to ward off the swine that’s on loose or the inevitable death.

Suddenly, the Nokia N95 is seen fencing an unprecedented challenge from the less sung N95 respirator. Instead of marvelling at the technological extravaganga of the Nokia offspring, people are now exchanging notes on the different N 95s (not Nokia) in the market. (After all people need to air their view.) So, the long queues (of people) near the chemist shops.

I wonder, again an obscure thought, why has the government not called for a week shut down of the chemist shops? Surely, this is the current hot hang out destination.So, I am not surprised to hear of more swine flu cases getting registered.

People buy the N95 to ward off the swine. After all they get to breathe filtered air for 3 days. That’s what the manufacturing company and the chemist say “use the N 95 for 3 days”. But doctors say not to reuse it. They recommend cotton reusable mask.

(Talking about filtered air, I wouldn’t be surprised if someone comes up with an idea to manufacture ‘air guard’ or ‘pure air’; a cousin of aquaguard. The look would be something like a scuba diving mask with a small apparatus for 3 way filtration process.)

Coming back to N95 (again not Nokia), truly a blessing in these baneful times. No laughing matter. After all, it keeps the artiodactyls at bay! It purifies the ‘contaminated’ air. And we contaminate it further by throwing the masks on the road (Yaar, idhaar phek kachra already jamaa hai) and we queue up again to buy more masks and again throw it on the kachrae ka heap. Whoever said that our purchasing power has declined must be choking now. That’s what is keeping the economy on the move.

Entry of the street children and the rag pickers, non human, roadside pests, menace to the society, doesn’t matter to us if they fall ill. Population decline, less gundaegee (dirt) … the saga continues. We are God; we have the right to label humans. We only need to see that we are secured, secured from financial woes and illness, how these lesser mortal lives is of no concern to us. We get pest control done for our home, but don’t even give it a thought when we throw the small plastic wrapper or the chocolate wrapper from our air-conditioned car on the road, after all, the road is already gunda. And N 95, we throw it the farthest. Never near our home.

Ok, but there are concerned people too. They throw the used N95, wrapped in a plastic zip pouch, in their dustbin. How empathetic! These are the people who do their 2 bits for the society; gives charity regularly to the “Most” reputable NGO (gets the tax benefit). Wonderful! The garbage disposable van comes and collects the garbage in an open truck. The nicely wrapped used N95 too, finds a place in the open van. A strong wind and on the road (have seen this happening). And, it is the same story all over again.

To quote a doctor from the esteemed AIIMS, “Most N95 respirators are designed to filter 95% particulates of 0.3µ, while the size of H1N1 virus is about 0.1µ. Hence, dependence on N95 to protect against H1N1 is like protecting against rain with an umbrella made of mosquito net.”

If at all you need to use a mask, use cloth mask. The best bet is to use a clean handkerchief. You can go home and wash it. I am not even itsy bitsy surprised about the swine flu pandemic. Ye toh hona he tha!

..of lies and aam janta

2009-03-05T23:00:00.005+05:30

The headline in today’s national newspaper – “BJP, Cong hog big biz funds” had me seething in rage. How dare they loot and exhibit the hard earned money of the working class (irrespective of the color of the collars) …..

When recession is hitting all of us and maiming us, when we are even scared to dream, when we are desperately trying to cut down on, (even), our necessities to bare minimum, when children are forced to drop out of schools and colleges for lack of fund or sponsorship, when people are resorting to the last desperate measure of taking their lives and ending the lives of the little ones – And these ‘netas’ are collecting funds, readily doled out by the very business houses that are kicking people out, to publicize their agendas.

Come election time, we hear about all these ‘… point programmes’ and how they have kept their words to the ‘aam janta’, how they have coursed the ‘Matri bhoomi’ to self reliance and wealth…blah...blah…

Do we really care to hear such bulbous self glorifications? Aren’t we having enough of them, staring at us from every TV channel and newspaper, every single day?

We see and experience what they are doing, have done and get a fair idea of the impending deeds, then why this propaganda? We, the ‘aam janta’ are their report card, then why spend such disgusting amount propaganding their virtues and the opponent’s failure. We have ears and eyes.

When organizations are kicking out people or shutting doors, I wonder from where they get such money to fill the political kitty.

According to DNA, the Aditya Birla group donated some 21+ crores to the Congress. The list is long. These very organization, don’t give a thought showing the door to many talented, educated, honest, tax paying individuals, yet they have money to placate the politicians.

There’s a whisper going around, come election time, the economy will start looking up. The logic is: Money spent on campaigning> trading > economic boost.

Simple!

We have to be idiots to buy such craps.

America just had an election, huge amount of money was spent (as reported by the media.) dressing up the contestants and their family, so did that boost the fashion industry?

This aam janta is no economist, she does not understand the statistics. What this aam janta know is she is honest (and do not fudge accounts), she works very hard trying to make ends meet, ensuring that her kids get their basic dues, cutting down on stuffs that would make her life a bit comfortable – and here are the over inflated, dodgy politicians, in their sponsored Armani’s, spending aam jantas money to advertise lies on the basis of fudged statistics. Yes, this aam janta is very angry.

Unsync....

2008-11-09T22:03:00.001+05:30

We are a nation of 28 states, 7 union territories (Do I have the right figure?

Are we still 28 states or have I missed out on more partitions) and billions of people of all caste, creed, color and dialect. We have been living in harmony for centuries, fought battles together, and overcame disasters and calamities till the better half of the 20th century…when suddenly our dodgy, rickety, self proclaimed leaders decided to exercise their arthritic mind and dole out declarations for reservations in democratic institutions and organizations.

The result is all for us to see. The East, West, North and the South are all aflame. The East doesn’t want churches, the west doesn’t want mosques, and North doesn’t want temples.

Where does this lead us normal mortals? Living in perpetual fear, not knowing whether your head would be the next target of an over excited politician’s goon….

Happiness is a by-product of an effort to make someone else happy

2008-01-15T19:52:00.001+05:30

It's been a month since the ‘Bee’ family choose my balcony to set up their home. You can well imagine my fright; a sting is not what I cherish. They lorded over my favorite place and turned me out of my cozy corner.

Gradually, they started invading the bed room too. The insect repellants failed to ward them off my territory. They made me feel like a tresspasser in my own home. This went on for a couple of days until I recalled how our gardener would create smoke of dry weeds and leaves to ward off the bees.

I, too, started doing the same. I have to make them understand that they better lay off my territory. (Assertiveness pays). I thought this tamed them.

But No, they turned out with vengeance when, one day, I didn’t put up the repellant. I guess it was then,that, one of them managed to enter my bedroom but somehow hurt itself and could not make it's way out. Cautiously I picked it up on a paper and contemplated going near the hive to put it near it's family. It was not until late afternoon that I, finally,managed to fathom some guts and tentatively went near the hive to leave it there.

A swarm of adventurous but angry bees, hell bent on revenge, flew up, ready to attack me when I went near the hive. Flaying my arms around blindly to ward of the insects,I managed to, somehow, delicately place the injured bee near the hive and ran indoor.

Watching the circus from my bedroom window, I saw the agitated bees all around my balcony, some trying to get in through the window mesh (They reminded me of our political goons, and their desperate act to extract their pound of flesh at any cost).

The activity lasted for a couple of hours until sense prevailed and they released that they have an injured kith to look after.(Reminded me of a road accident scene where the injured lay moaning in pain while the mob got busy scorching buses and damaging property).

I guess they realized that I have actually saved one of their brothers. From that day onward, they have stopped bothering me and I have stopped using bee repellant. That was last week.

Inshallah!!!

It's was a lesson for me. We tend to forget the very hand which had helped us one, but animals/ bugs never forget that helping hand.

Humbling experience

2007-12-03T10:20:00.005+05:30

Yesterday I accompanied my socially conscious friends to a school for the visually impaired.

I was left open mouthed by the optimism, the revelry and gratefulness of the kids there. The experience left me feeling upbeat and buoyant. What I learnt there is that blind and visually impaired people can learn to do almost anything, except maybe fly an airplane.

All it needs to make them independent and ‘normal’ is to empower them with a sense of confidence and self-esteem. What I also learnt there is to treat them as any other ‘normal’ kid. If people pity them and goes out of their way to help them and burden them with too much attention, this subtle message, can actually, ruin a child. The child would then start feeling that they are too “handicapped” to learn to do things for themselves.

I met Gayatri, a 7 year old kid who is visually impaired since birth. To add to her agony, she wasn’t taught to walk either. Her mother would leave her sitting in one corner when she went out to work while her drunken father lolled in another corner. Although she has twisted legs, her spirits is as sprightly as her words. With physiotherapy, she is slowly learning to walk. I am sure, it wouldn’t be long when she can run around the compound too.

Sheetal, a 12 year’s old girl, was not visually impaired at birth. She was a bright, vivacious girl like any other girl her age. Her blindness is the result of domestic violence. The acid, which was meant for her mother’s face, splashed on her face, impairing her for life. That happened when she was just 5. She has never seen her parents since then, neither have they. They have dumped her from their life. This little body is the epitome of forgiveness and optimism. In fact, she is one of the toppers in her class.

I met and interacted with many more kids. And they left me feeling incompetent, crass and crude. Here I am, blessed with the ability to see all things beautiful, yet, sometimes, I fail to notice the beauty and, instead, grunt about the mite. Those kids at Jagriti, have never seen the daylight, yet they are buoyant and optimistic. They are not disabled, it is me who is disabled… disabled in spite of having all the ability to function. Those kids taught me not to pity another human being.

I learnt to not to think of people as disabled.Rather, they are people who happen to be differently abled!

......cracking woes

2007-12-01T05:04:00.001+05:30

Every parent wants their child to be happy. But no parent would want that happiness at the cost of another child. And definitely not me.

If not giving permission to buy crackers is akin to cruelty, well, I stand guilty of violating child rights (What’s that????????????).

Giving a child ‘a little bit of crackers’ (made and designed by another kid like her) for a few moments of ‘happiness’ (at the cost of another’s), which would be forgotten the next day…. Will she really appreciate those few moments of laughter when she grows up and learn that she, too, is responsible for maiming another human?

The question here is not whether I begrudged my daughter her ‘enjoyment’. That’s not the issue at all. The issue is ‘our callous attitude’; the issue is ‘misinterpretation of festivals and religious ceremony’; of 'global warming'; and the biggest issue is, of course, the burgeoning population and its effect on our economy which in turn affects child rights.

Pheeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww!!!

‘Sponsoring a child labor (from a cracker factory) to school’…. A laudable thought no doubt, but the question is - will this really eradicate the problem of child labor in hazardous industries?

When you take out few from those death traps in Sivakasi, there will, always, be some more to replace them. It’s like a vicious circle. These very people-who find it difficult to get two-square meal a day, are the ones who procreate like ‘maggots’. They are the ones who send their children to work or pawn their children for money.

So the equation is: more children = more money (They also know that there are ‘big-hearted’ people in this world who would take up their responsibility.)

Then ‘what’s the backup plan if those children aren’t allowed to work?’ They go to school. Yes, they go to school. Primary education is Free in all government school. And what’s more, a free mid-day meal is provided to all children in government, corporation, panchayat and municipal schools in the country.

Yeah, mere learning of the alphabets’ would not earn them their rozi-roti. Vocational training should be a part of the curriculum. How about initiating workshops/ laboratories in these schools where the kids can make paper bags, cards, handicraft items or even embroidery items. (We, too, had SUPW and craft periods in schools). These products could be sold through proper channels to ensure that the artisans get a good return.

This is one back up plan that a dim-wit like me have cooked up.

I have another one - a blasphemous idea – GET THOSE MEN STERILIZED!!!! ;)

Cribbing is our birth right

2007-11-28T03:14:00.001+05:30

Last week, I had a discussion with a friend on how we, the educated Indians, should be less lackadaiscal, and, instead, proactively participate in exercising our franchise to root out corrupt politicians.

Well, he may have a point there, but my cynicism is deep rooted; I have often felt that we, the so- called educated, love to crib about the rampant corruption prevalent in our country, curse our leaders and never let go a chance to air our 2 cents on 'what is right and what is wrong'.

(I do it, i.e., CRIB… yet… I bribed a cop to let my Peppy off...)

Now, how many of us really go and vote? Countable few. And why? Well, there is no dearth of reasons.

Basically, we just love to sit on our ass and hate to queue up in the smoldering heat with the lesser mortals to cast our vote. Or it could be because of lack of choice of candidates in the run… (We can only choose from highly corrupt to less corrupt) Or it could be the uncertainty of our vote already cast (CRIB…CRIB…CRIB…)

At 2:30AM, my buddies – idealism and romanticism, came knocking and nudged me out of my reverie. They suggested that voters' ID card should have an identification number. This way every citizen has an identification number.

This will benefit our country in the following way:

1. Keep tab on illegal immigrants
2. Keep tab on the adult population and indirectly on the population growth rate.

Online voting should also be made available. Educated computer literate citizen should be given a PW and user id, (like the ones we have in office). These ids would be unique; in fact it could be their citizen ID…

If this is done, we can expect the following benefits:

1. More number of educated voters turnout.
2. Indians living abroad can also vote
3. Check on corruption
4. Restriction on illegal immigrants during polls
5. Taming of hoodlums

I listened to them and thought, it would definitely make a good movie script – another Chak De .We can then, maybe, expect conscientious people to take the streets urging others to come out… shouting Chak De voters…

Cracking woes

2007-11-09T21:08:00.001+05:30

Yesterday, my daughter pleaded with me to give her permission to buy sparklers. And the obstinate me would not do so, which resulted in many heated arguments and emotional breakdowns.

“How can I not burst cracker on Diwali…. All my friends bought lots of crackers…I will be the only one standing like a fool watching them having fun... oh you don’t love me…you don’t want to see me happy..”

Well, after a lot of haggling and intense debate, my daughter could see sense and peace prevailed.

Inshaallah!!!

Well, this got me thinking (an unconventional thought) - why do we associate Diwali with crackers…it should be celebrated with sweets, lights and color. The very belief that firecrackers and fireworks are used to attract — or to advertise — good luck should be deleted from our mind.

A lot need to be undone to change the mindset and this should happen from home, permeate to school curriculum. Maybe, then the legal eagles would start flapping their wings …. !!!!

A lot has changed since we were kids. I agree, we had plenty of fun during Diwali and Baba would always bring big cartoons of crackers which would lasts for a week; most of our friends would come to our house for the cracker show... well, that was before we came to know about Sivakasi and the children involved in these factories.

Today, when I was sitting out, in my balcony, my reverie was disturbed with the resounding bursting of crackers and the romantic aura of the scented candles in the dark night vanished.

I visualized those little ones, their tiny hands fiddling with those hazardous chemicals as they fantasied about what they will get to eat at night or whether they will get to eat at all…:(

Our constitution eloquently proclaims - "No child below the age of fourteen years shall be employed to work in any factory or mine or employed in any hazardous employment".

It does just that – PROCLAIMS... the problem still persists.

Enforcement is the key aspect that is lacking in the government's efforts. Child labor is a global problem. If child labour is to be eradicated, the governments and agencies and those responsible for enforcement need to start doing their jobs.

The most important thing is to increase awareness and keep discussing ways and means to check this problem. We have to decide whether we are going to take up the problem head-on and fight it any way we can or leave it to the adults who might not be there when things go out of hand.

Perception about violence against women among medical and nursing student

2007-10-28T09:53:00.001+05:30

This one is a revelation. Indian Council of Medical Research (ICMR) conducted a study on the “Perception about violence against women among medical and nursing student”.

Out of the 250 students from D.Y Patil Medical College that were interviewed 86 were males.

Read on:

39.6% male respondents
10.1% female respondents agreed that wives try to get beaten by their husband in order to gain sympathy
31.5% males
15.1% females opines that wives refusing sex were "asking to be beaten"
32.6% males
27.7% females agrees that it would do some wives good to be beaten up by their husband
37.2% males
21.1% females believes that occasional violence by husband maintains the marriage

(taken from Times of India, 26/10/’07)
Shocking!

Well, no wonder we have such lackadaisical, unsympathetic and immoral medicos. Is medical education only about solutions to ailments? What about the ‘person’, the humane touch? It is high time that the medicos are sensitized towards the important issue of domestic violence and its impact on physical and emotional health.

Whose child is this?

2007-09-05T09:42:00.002+05:30

"Whose child is this?"
i asked one day
seeing a little one
out at play.

"Mine", said the parent
with a tender smile".
"Mine to keep
a little while
To bathe his hands
and comb his hair
To tell him what
he is to wear
To prepare him that he
may always be good
And each day do the
things he should".

"Whose child is this?"
i asked again
As the door opened and
someone came in.

"Mine", said the teacher
with the same
tender smile.

"Mine,to keep just
for a little while
To teach him how to be
gentle and kind
To train and direct his
dear little mind
To help him live by
every rule
And get the best he
can from school".

"Whose child is this?",
i asked once more
Just as the little one
entered the door.

"Ours", said the parent
and the teacher
as they smiled
And each took the hand
of the little child
"Ours to love and
train together
Ours this blessed
task forever".

(This is a wonderful piece..unfortunately the author's identity is not known.)

What Nautanki..

2007-04-10T20:50:00.001+05:30

I am trying hard to recall the civics lessons from my school days, so correct me if I am wrong- isn’t it said that ours is a sovereign, socialist, secular, democratic republic (all spelled in bold).

Millions of rupees are spent on campaigning by our “netas” who dole out eloquent promises, sweeter than my favorite rossogolla, and then, conveniently relapse into amnesia. Their deafening cry “ Hum Saab Ek Hai……..blah…blah…”reverberates through the 1000 watt speakers, strategically placed, flouting all the laws of Pollution, startling the new born babies from their reveries,disturbing the concentration of the students and rattling the nerves of the aged.

And then, from their air conditioned, cushy office, they devise strategy to create more fissure among the masses by deliberately segregating humanity into schedule caste and schedule tribe, upper caste, lower caste, etc, etc... (Did I miss out any… oh yeah…OBC!)

God Almighty… that’s what they think they are. (Or am I the cynical one)

Remember Those Who Molded You

2007-02-25T08:45:00.001+05:30

I would like to share a poem (by an anonymous poet) which left an indelible impression on me.

Around the corner I have a friend
In this great city that has no end.
Yet the days go by and the weeks rush on,
And before I know it a year is gone!

And I never see my old friend’s face,
For life is a swift and a terrible race.
He knows I like him just as well,
As in the days when I rang his bell.

And he rang mine, though we were younger then,
And now we are busy tired men.
Tired of playing a foolish game,
Tired of trying to make a name.

“Tomorrow,” I say, “I will call Jim,”
Just to show that I’m thinking of him.
But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,
And the distance between us grows and grows.

Around the corner- yet miles away,
Here’s a telegram, sir: “Jim died today.”
And that is what we get and deserve in the end,
Around the corner, a vanished friend!

Goody... Two Shoes

2007-01-22T23:35:00.001+05:30

The Shilpa Shetty episode had really rocked the nation, so much so that my daughter, who otherwise is just into Cartoon and Hungama television, switched over to watching the news for any snippets of the issue between Jade ‘Goody’ and Shilpa Shetty.

But her curiosity is not what was said to her, but why such a hue and cry was created for such an episode. When I told her that is about racism (I definitely had a tough time explaining what that word meant) she replied offhandedly, “but Ma, nobody creates such a fuss when we Indians introduce our fellow countrymen as a Bengali, a Bihari, a Madrassi, etc.

How true, here the world is debating about whether Shilpa Shetty was ridiculed or not, when all the while we continue to do this for every faux passé made by our fellow countrymen and never fail to retort “oye Bangali……., Sardar…. Etc.”

True Friends

2007-01-22T06:15:00.001+05:30

(This is a poem written by my 9 years old daughter, Oashe)

Friends are always with us
No matter what may come.
Friends who helps us when we are in trouble
Are real friends,
For friend in need is a friend indeed.
But some friends are good weather friends;
They leave us in times of trouble.
But we shouldn’t be sad when that happens,
It is then that we really know them.

Ode to life

2006-11-13T20:50:00.002+05:30

What is life?
A saga of breath-
One after another
In rhythmic chime.

What is life?
A trek through the dark greens
On shadowy path-
Strewn with thorns and boulders-

A journey –
A pilgrimage –
in search of that evasive love
which seems near yet is so far –
a journey, nevertheless…
in search of that eternal light.

Life is an uncertain saga where the only certain element is ‘breath’ which is the fuel that infuses life with all its triumphs and travails. Just like fuel, when it is contaminated, causes vehicular hiccups, in the same manner, the breath, when contaminated, cause life to hiccup. The hiccups, which I am referring to, are the various trails and tribulations that a person faces.

A moment can change ones’ destiny- that is make or break a person. Now this is certain in life. The reality is – we have absolutely no control over anything be it on a person or for that matter life. It is wrong to assume that everything we have is for keeps- be it our husband, our children, or material possession.

The more we hold on to these worldly possessions, the unhappier we will be. The sooner this truth is realized, the better it is for all.

Protection of Women from Domestic Violence

2006-10-28T21:07:00.002+05:30

According to a notification issued by the Ministry of Women and Child Development The Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, 2006 has come into effect. This law is expected to provide women- wives, mother, mother-in-law, sisters, daughters, and even adopted daughter- protection against physical, verbal and sexual abuse and the right to shelter and economic freedom.

This is a laudable effort, no doubt, to curb atrocities on women. But the question here is “ how effectively would it be implemented?”

I may sound pessimistic, but my pessimism is based on my experience and from my avid interest in NEWS. There are laws to protect women from the dowry demands, from Sati, etc.., yet, scores of women have been slaughtered on one pretext or another. Where were our law keepers then? Rape cases goes on for years and it takes a long time to pass the verdict.

I feel that these legislations are mere lollies dolled out to the women fraternity. No amount of legislation will put an end to these evils. Well, I don’t mean to ridicule this legislation. This piece of legislation, like any other legislation, can only be enforced when there are honest, serious and committed enforcement officers.

Now, this is another thought that stuck me: How many Indian women would truly, speak up about her pain and trauma, and that to to an enforcement officer. Indian women are glamorized as paragon of patience and virtue in the media; they would rather tolerate than lodge a formal complaint. Most women have been tutored, right from childhood, the concept of “grin and bear”. If at all they decide to speak up, they would probably take their problems to family and friend. What happens then- they are sent right back after being pacified and made to believe that “she is not the only one going through such problems- every woman experiences the same… have patience..”

The need for the hour is not more legislations but to ensure that each girl child gets proper education; the need for the hour is total transformation of the pseudo societal thought or mindset; the need for the hour is ensuring financial empowerment. Financial empowerment will automatically ensure security and generate confidence, not to forget, social recognition.

Values... Whats' that?

2006-09-12T10:32:00.001+05:30

Recently, in our locality, a senior citizen, aged around 80, ran away from her house, leaving her husband dazed. The reason is still not clear though. Some says that the daughter-in-law is the reason; some says it is over property dispute.

Whatever the reason may be; the fact remains that she left her home, of over 50 years, in desperation.

This makes me ponder- where has materialism led us? In this rat- race of one- up – man ship, we have relegated our values, traditions and most importantly our souls to the proverbial ‘backseat’.

Have our values become redundant?

India has been culturally acclaimed and, infact revered, by the foreigners. They remain awestruck when we narrate tales of how we all stay together under one roof, how we never send our senior citizens to old age homes and how we involve them in our lives.

I remember quiet clearly; we had some Dutch ladies as our houseguest some twenty years ago. They were clearly impressed by our family and were, infact, astounded when they saw that we lived in joint family. Although there were so many people, yet things worked on well without anyone stepping on the others’ feet. It was a lesson on managerial effectiveness, team work and interpersonal skills, I am sure they have learnt, which no Business schools would be able to teach.

Of course practicality demands that joint family disintegrate; but it seems that with this disintegration, our values and ideals, too have eroded. Whom should we blame for this? We have this habit of ‘passing the buck’ for we hate to take responsibility of this mass social degeneration on our shoulder-The mother-in-law blames the daughter-in –law; the father blames the mother; the sisters their brother, executives their bosses, the police points at the politicians , the politicians at the judiciary , the judiciary at the…. and this is how the blame game continues; nobody knows where it will stop for God has created plenty of earthlings to ensure that this game doesn’t stop.

Has teacher day outlived its importance?

2006-09-05T20:59:00.001+05:30

When Dr. Radhakrishnan became the president of India in 1962, some of his students and friends approached him and requested him to allow them to celebrate 5th September, his "birthday". In reply, Dr, Radhakrishnan said, "instead of celebrating my birthday separately, it would be my proud privilege if September 5 is observed as Teachers' day". The request showed Dr.Radhakrishnan's love for the teaching profession. From then onwards, the day has been observed as Teachers' Day in India.

Remember Socrates. Well, he considered himself a learner as well as a teacher. For Socrates, love and friendship were the proper contexts for the pursuit of wisdom and goodness. Socrates saw himself only as a catalyst. He felt it was not his teaching, but actually the power of the Divine, which enabled the person, he was talking with to improve himself.

Teachers are supposed to mold the lives that they influence. Lessons learned from teachers remain with their students throughout life.

On this context, I ask my reader “ Has teachers day outlived its importance?”

Be honest and speak out. Do you really feel that teacher’s day celebration is heartfelt?

In the rat race of life and materialism, we have forgotten the reasons for the reverence of this particular day as teacher’s day.

I vividly remember how teachers would dress up in gaudy clothes with ‘greasepaints’ on their faces, carrying extra big bag for teacher day celebration. Later on, I realized that the number of cards, flowers or gifts (received surreptitiously) a teacher receives determined her popularity. In fact she acted like the queen bee, calling the rooster and showing off her possessions.

I would also like to mention the writings in Manu Smriti, which states, "By accepting gifts the divine light in the person gets extinguished". Manu warns every individual against accepting gifts for the reason that it places the acceptor under an obligation in favor of the person who gave the gift and ultimately it results in making a person to do things, which are not permitted according to law.

I wonder whether these ‘learned ‘ people ever experiences pangs of guilt. I have my doubts.

Look around you; notice the sudden demand for tuition teachers. Now, who is responsible for this? Parents are forced to send their wards for tuition because their children’s marks have suddenly plummeted and the only one who could salvage their sagging marks are their teachers. It is like our famous coalition government – high marks and tuition.

Looking from a broader perspective, we cannot really blame the teacher’s alone for creating a demand for private tuition.Many teachers are exhausted from their workload and responsibilities. They have their own families, financial and life stresses that challenge them along with everyone else. And what does a teacher earns vis-à-vis the amount of labor he/she puts in?

But, then, who are suffering? -The students, the teachers and the fate of our world. We all can see the results on newspaper and televisin. The recent killing of the professor in Ujjain speaks eloquently about the attitude of the student fraternity towards the educators.

This makes me ponder on the relevance of celebrating teachers’ day. I feel that we are making a mockery of the great teacher’s wish. He would have never, in his wildest dreams, have fathomed the deteriorating ethical standard in the teaching profession that is ubiquitous now.

It is a sad reality that teachers that break down barriers and reach into the souls of the students that they are responsible for do not get the recognition or gratitude they have earned. Teachers need encouragement and support from the community to feel that their devotion to students is appreciated.

When I say teachers, I mean all individual, whether they are professional teachers or not. Infact, every adult, by default, becomes a teacher.

What are we teaching our children? Do we really want another scene from Ujjain to be recreated?

Quotable Quotes

2006-09-05T19:19:00.001+05:30

Here are few mantras that keeps me going through in my professional life.

A good teacher is like a candle - it consumes itself to light the way for others. ~Author Unknown

Good teachers are costly, but bad teachers cost more. ~Bob Talbert

Teaching should be full of ideas instead of stuffed with facts. ~Author Unknown

We expect teachers to handle teenage pregnancy, substance abuse, and the failings of the family. Then we expect them to educate our children. ~John Sculley

Teaching is leaving a vestige of one self in the development of another. And surely the student is a bank where you can deposit your most precious treasures. ~Eugene P. Bertin

The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires. ~William Arthur Ward

"I hear, and I forget. I see, and I remember. I do, and I understand." - Chinese Proverb

"If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got" - NLP adage

"No matter how good teaching may be, each student must take the responsibility for his own education." - John Carolus S. J.

"Praise, like gold and diamonds, owes its values only to its scarcity." - Samuel Johnson

"Teachers should guide without dictating, and participate without dominating." - C.B. Neblette

"Teach your children by what you are, not just by what you say" - Jane Revell & Susan Norman

"The authority of those who teach is often an obstacle to those who want to learn." - Cicero

"The basic idea behind teaching is to teach people what they need to know." - Carl Rogers

"The job of an educator is to teach students to see the vitality in themselves." - Joseph Campbell

"To teach is to learn twice." - Joseph Joubert

"We think too much about effective methods of teaching and not enough about effective methods of learning." - John Carolus S. J.

"Who dares to teach must never cease to learn." - John Cotton Dana

"You cannot teach a man anything; you can only help him find it within himself." - Galielo Galilei

Sense and Sensibility

2006-09-05T13:38:00.001+05:30

During my tenure as a class teacher of Std. 9, an incident occurred which scandalized the ‘sensibility’ of the ‘learned’ lot. Two adolescent were caught smooching in one of the empty classroom.

This was discussed in hushed tones in the campus and the poor girl was labeled a shrew. Her friends avoided her and the teachers ignored her. She was severely reprimanded, and was also suspended from the school for 7 days. I guess she had to undergo further humiliations by her kith and kin. But the boy was spared such humiliations. He was let off after a routine reprimand and of course 7 days of suspension.

When she joined the school, it was clear that she was under tremendous stress and I guess it costs her a lot to attend school. On noticing her trauma, I sent her to the school counselor, who in a pragmatic tone, ruled her out and emphatically pronounced, “ oh she is that kind of a girl….”. Off-putting comments about her family background and her parents’ character ruled the staff room.

When I decided to counsel her, the puritans, too analyzed my character. I was called by the high command to explain why I had snubbed their decision of ignoring the girl and ‘forgetting’ the incident….
I insisted that reprimanding the girl will not solve the problem and I, as a human being first and then as a teacher, have a responsibility towards her future to ensure that she doesn’t go about smooching every Tom, Dick and Harry whenever her hormones plays truant.

I was told that such cases happen in every school. And what do they do? Nothing. “Sex and sexuality issues are taboo subjects not to be discussed. “Nobody told us about ‘these things’ … we got to know about it at the right time…”; spat came the replies from my esteemed colleagues

Well, I do agree with them. Our times were different. We were really stupid. We didn’t have the option of such vast array of serials or for that matter the Internet. But these kids have and it is us who have lured them to think and experiment. The garrulous moaning, panting and sighing, the look of ecstasy and rejuvenations on the screen motivates them and they feel they ought to try it out.

I was considerably alarmed when I learnt from my doctor friend about the alarming rise in teenage pregnancy in this small city. We cannot afford to be complacent any more. This is happening. We cannot simply blame the media or the West for this. Our kids are growing and they are immature; the onus is on us to guide them and tell them about the birds and the bees so that they can take sensible decisions so as not to unruffle the sensibility of the puritans.

Anti-Rape Female Condom

2006-09-01T12:30:00.001+05:30

( This is an excerpt from the mail sent by my sis, Navanita)

A South African inventor unveiled a new anti-rape female condom that hooks onto an attacker's penis and aims to cut one of the highest rates of sexual assault in the world.

The device, made of latex and held firm byshafts of sharp barbs, can only be removed from the man through surgerywhich will alert hospital staff, and ultimately, the police.

It also reduces the chances of a woman falling pregnant or contracting AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases from the attacker by acting in the same way as a female condom.

South Africa has more people with HIV/AIDS than any other country, with onein nine of its 45 million population infected. Ehlers, who showed off a prototype on Wednesday, said women had tried it for comfort and it had been tested on a plastic male model but not yet on a liveman. Production was planned to start next year.

You can read more on it at http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9145415/

I would love to hear your views on this - what do you think? Do you think this will reduce the frightening statistics on violence against women? DO you think this will deter rapists? What about gang rapes? What about rapes during war? What about rapes on women living in refugee camps with no orvery little access to resources?

Daughter's Gift

2006-09-01T12:00:00.001+05:30

(Photograph clicked by Fr.Kenna S.J.)

I am so overwhelmed by the thoughtful gesture of my little daughter on my birthday, that I felt I ought to brag about it to all.

My daughter, Oashe, is just 8, a wonderful child and my pride. She is so creative and thoughtful with an empathic soul.

Her first instruction, after wishing me, " Ma, don't you dare to touch the broom today(metaphorically speaking).... I will clean the house once I return from school..."

Well, can any mother have a better gift than these words? The very fact that she said those words touched my soul to the very core.

In the evening, she surprised me with a really big, mouth-watering strawberry cake and some snacks.

The highlight of the evening was when she put up a puppet show, coining the story at the spur of the moment.This left me spell bound.

I hope all of you bless her so that she grows up to be an honest citizen of the world.

"Your heart is born free: have the courage to follow it"

2006-08-24T22:00:00.001+05:30

While browsing through a bookstore, I came across a book by Mr. Patrick Snow – ‘CREATING YOUR OWN DESTINY’. This book elaborates “How to get exactly what you want out of life.”

Mr. Snow helps the reader to gain knowledge and confidence. The bottom line being you must love and believe yourself.

Pathelic plight of Indian sportsperson

2006-08-23T09:26:00.001+05:30

The shining- yellow, white….…and tanned stars……….
Dangling from Athens….afar….
Reckoning… come…get me……
Gearing up _
Our athlete speeds…
A little more gas pumped in _
_ Accelerator buzzing….
The end looks near _
Oh! _ Just around the turn_
Smiling _ (dreaming about the crown)
Wondering into yonder land….

Alas! Speed slackens,
From nowhere land, an athlete
Whizzes by………
Leaving us gaping – with rounded eyes
Slipping the medals from our clutch.

Excuses come forth…
…. A galore…
Partiality… We cry
Blaming everybody… but us.

India- one of the greatest civilization of mankind, with a history and a culture running into thousands of years…. But now, far, far away from being the best in almost all aspects of life – especially in sports...

We have all known the shame of waiting day after day for India to appear on the list at all, as countries a hundredth our size, record gold upon gold. And Indians athletes succeeded, in spite of problems, not in the absence of them.
So why can’t we? Why are those glittering rounds eluding us? Where have we gone wrong? Indeed it is a desperate situation- 1 billion people and just 1 silver.

We have to set up a system that will help us to win medals.

Abuses of vitamins

2006-08-23T09:19:00.001+05:30

How many of us are aware of the fact that excess intake of Vitamins poses immense health risk. City Doctors have sounded a red alert on the enormous use of vitamins. Doctors prescribe them at the slightest pretext. Besides, they are easily accessible across the counters.

Why do I need them?Vitamins are a group of organic compounds needed in minute quantities (less than 1 per cent of our food is composed of vitamins).
Vitamins regulate the body's metabolism, by speeding up chemical reactions, acting as antioxidants or forming an integral part of the structure of proteins, hormones and blood. The body cannot produce them so they must be supplied by food.Vitamins are needed in minute amounts for health, growth and to prevent vitamin-deficiency diseases such as scurvy (lack of vitamin C), beri-beri (vitamin B1), pellagra (vitamin B2) or rickets (vitamin D).

According to a reputed consultant eye specialist based in Jamshedpur, “Ideally, it is best to obtain all your vitamins from food, not pills. Food provides vitamins in the most biologically-available form, in the right amounts and combined with other complementary nutrients. Except under special circumstances, from food there is low risk of overdose.”

He is of the opinion that, there are certain groups who could benefit from a supplement (such as smokers, fussy eaters or the elderly). However he cautions to be wary of the over-enthusiastic promises made by vitamin sellers. Often the scientific evidence is not reliable, consisting of anecdotes from 'satisfied' patients or the people treating them. Not all the claims for supplements have been proven. A recent examination of studies into vitamin C and the common cold showed that it could slightly shorten the duration of colds - but not prevent them entirely. If you do take supplements, think of them only as a ‘top up’ to your daily diet. Supplements aren’t ‘magic bullets’ – they won’t supply everything we get from good food (as many beneficial phyto-chemicals are not found in any pill) nor can they counteract a bad diet with too much fat or salt. Often they leave you with a false sense of security so that you think you don’t need to worry about the junk you’ve eaten.In recent years, however, attitudes to supplements have changed, as numerous studies have emerged suggesting that supplements, especially the antioxidant supplements, are associated with better health outcomes.

Excess doses of vitamins results in the following dangers:

1.Excess vitamin A is toxic and causes loss of appetite, nausea and a dry itchy skin.

2.Excess beta-carotene can turn the skin and whites of the eyes an orange-yellow (which slowly disappears once the excess stops).

3.Excess vitamin D causes calcium to be deposited in soft tissues, as well as vomiting and diarrhoea.

4.Excess niacin causes flushing and interferes with liver function.

5.Overdose of vitamin B6 produces a loss of sensation in the body's extremities (due to damage to the sensory nerves).

Friends, take a deep breath, think twice before hopping to the neighbourhood pharmacy for you miracle pill.

Robbing Childhood

2006-08-22T10:43:00.001+05:30

Sanj is just five and she is already in the rat race – going to a play school in the morning and to the tuition in the evening – which will prepare her for admission to a good school.

So what is new? It is the same story everywhere- especially parents of a four - five years old child can relate better with Sanj’s parents. “Sending my daughter to the tuition is the only option,” says Sandra, Sanj’s mother – a professional. She feels that the tuition teacher will train her daughter to write well as the schools take written tests.

Doctors say that starting school early and pressuring the child to read and write causes trauma, which develops anxiety and later leads to depression. Doctors stress that children develops ‘visual-motor co-ordination’ only at the age of seven, but they are forced to wield pencils as early as two years. This will in turn impair ‘visual-motor skills’. The child’s’ ability to adapt is severally compromised and she is always under stress. Having to perform makes children anxious. Parents too pass on their stress on to the children. This will later lead to substance abuse.

The 'anxious-about-her-future' parents do not think so. According to them – once she gets into a prestigious school, it will be smooth sailing.

Will it be, at what cost? City based counsellors and child psychologists are perturbed regarding the alarming rise in stress related cases among children below ten years of age. According to them, out of the every ten children, seven are acutely stressed. “Parents realise the enormity of the situation only when it goes beyond their control …cases of bed-wetting, stammering, temper tantrums are on the rise.”

Parents have their own reasons for it and so do the schools. Moreover, it becomes difficult after a while to determine who to blame – parents for creating demand for such schools or the latter for meeting the demand. Child today no longer has a childhood and tomorrow they will have nothing to look back. Parents are killing their child’s childhood for their own ambition.

Since at any given time, the number of children out numbers the number of seats in schools the pressure is always on the child. Parents have become more ambitious, exerting more and more pressure on their children. They feel that it is essential to attend preparatory schools as well as evening tuitions, as they help in developing the personality of the children as they prepare them for the rigours of the Kg admission tests.
Monika, (a mother of a four and half year old son) agrees that getting children admitted in a reputed school is a gigantic task and it pressurizes them, but she added, “With changing times, I think children too will have to learn to cope with pressure. Perhaps, this is the price they have to pay to be a part of the information age.”

So while the parents slog it out to pay for a good education for their child, the resultant pressure lands squarely on the child’s shoulders.

Child abuse

2006-08-20T12:42:00.001+05:30

Chubby cheeks, dimple chin, rosy lips-
Dent within.
Curly hair, very fair,
But in despair:
Eyes are blue- lovely two,
Who’s there to woo
The adorable two.

I like to share something that shocked the very core of my existence. It was like any other day when I went to drop my daughter to school. I saw a group of my friends standing in cluster and discussing animatedly. What I heard unnerved me and made me seethe in rage. A lady in the group was narrating a horrendous scene she witnessed on her way home. She saw a child being molested by the driver of her car pool at the back of the maruti van. The child, who has just started school, who is still unfamiliar with her body, was being kissed and fondled by a crude man who had been, ironically, entrusted with her security by her parents.

What is really scary is that people who sexually abuse children don’t look or act very different from most people and are not psychopaths. They are often revered upon by society and, sometimes, are very successful professional.

Contrary to popular belief, the fact is that in most cases of child sexual abuse, the child knows the abuser. Infact, we can say that child sexual abuse is most frequent within the acquaintance/family circle of the child.

I can empathize with that child who has gone through this kind of ordeal of humiliation and that is why my blood boiled over in rage at such gross violation of human rights. I blurted out to the speaker in the group, who clucking like ducklings, with hands folded, airing their sympathy-“why didn’t you stop and save her?”

“ Oh she is not my daughter… what if the driver humiliated me…?” I was aghast at this insensitive reply. I decided to be proactive and do something. But how? Not everybody is lucky like my daughter, who has her grandfather and me, to ferry her. I also told a Principal to discuss this issue at the Principal’s forum.

I don’t know if this matter was taken up or not at the forum but in this forum I have brought up this serious topic to draw people’s empathy.

Children are scared to tell anyone that they have been abused. Life becomes bewildering as they try to cope with the hurt and fear. Often they cannot fathom the enormity of this experience. Most often adults don’t understand what children are trying to tell them or hush up the matter for fear of being ridiculed. This would create emotional blockage and she would learn to hide all feelings of pain, hurt and fear, which would impair her for life.

The effects of child sexual abuse are long lasting and may leave deep scars on the child’s personality and we must become sensitive humans and not ignore the child on the pretext that “she is not mine”

Sister's Woe

2006-08-20T11:57:00.002+05:30

Marriages are said to be made in heaven
but….
Grimaced sister in woe;

Hollowed eye, farawaylook-
She stands alone…
Bearing the brunt
of agony, in lone.

Her body- a canvas..
Filled with swipes of black and blue and red.
Painted by an eccentric
Whenever his whims persist.

“That’s alright, you are born to bear”
Said sister upright..
“Forgive and forget..
You will be let..”

It is really ironical that - women themselves are their own worst enemies.It has been observed that most of the crime on a woman is inflicted by a woman.

What is domestic violence?

Well,to speak plainly without mincing any words,it is the pain,the humiliation,the abuses that is inflicted upon a person,disrupting her or his mental or physical equilibrium.

What is more heart-wrenching is that many educated women are tied down in an abusive marriage,mainly because of societal expectations.

It is high time that all conscientious human beings rise and shine.
Come let's join our hands to wipe out domestic violence.

Winners vs Losers

2006-08-20T01:38:00.002+05:30

Be wary of Failures,

Shrieked the keepers;

Carve a niche…

And save a stitch

Take a hitch

And you will reach Your grandeur.

It is a fact that society has always looked up to moneyed men and women and the less competent or lucky people, although never held in great esteem, were at least tolerated.

Take the case of Sonali (name changed). Being the eldest among her three siblings, her parents had invested lots of expectations on her. She grew up trying to fulfill all her parents dream and in the process got lost in the plethora of expectations and dreams. Ultimately, she was a failure, having chosen the wrong career. Thus, she was relegated as the proverbial ‘black sheep’ and labeled a nincompoop.

Lack of encouragement, motivation and self-esteem and relentless comparison with others spelt doom for her. Incessant contempt, criticism, jibes and utter disregard made her look for love and happiness elsewhere and she pursued it with a vengeance.She had forgotten that happiness is like a butterfly, the more you chase it, and the further it will fly.

With the changing socio-economic scenario, the non-achievers have been rendered as superfluous oddities, best forgotten. Success and successful people are more visible today, thanks to the media, than before.No wonder, then, that the frustration of people who have not yet made it increase as they inch towards invisibility, knowing that their families are slowly giving up on them.

Don’t you think that it is high time that family members de-stigmatized failure and ‘failures’? Infact, we must redefine ‘failure’. An effective way to do so would be to recognize any failure as temporary and society should stop looking at people as commodities, weighing assets and deficits.